Christmas (and other) Cheer

Ahhhhh. Let's reflect for a moment on Christmas, and other 'cheer.'

Our family enjoys different traditions that we've come to look forward to each year.

Christmas Eve is spent with John's Dad (Boo) and his wife (Cici). There is a long-standing tradition of the Fareses getting together Christmas Eve, and our children expect to go to Boo & Cici's the day before Christmas! My husband grew up going to his Farese grandparents on Christmas Eve--exchanging gifts with cousins and sharing the anticipation of the most cherished day of the year. I included a photo of our girls at the "little table" Cici always provided! The afternoon of Christmas Day is spent with John's sweet mother and her family. The 'Stannard' side of the family gets together at their compound in Holly Springs [side note: YES, I'm aware my side of the family is missing from our Christmas traditions and I'm slightly bitter, but that's another post!] John's mother and her husband have a beautiful home next to her sister, John's aunt Vicki, and her husband. Vivian & Vicki are MommyDivas from way back--honey, they can do it all. Vivian decks her halls beautifully--I have a 'bit' to live up to! In spite of suffering from breast cancer (and her husband recently recovered from lung cancer) my mother-in-law graciously had us to her home Christmas Day. Thanks be to God for traditions that keep all of us motivated during exceedingly difficult times. Vivian and Smitty have been an inspiration--when the worst comes you live each day with resolve, dignity and as much strength as you can muster.

We always get together and exchange gifts with our dear friends the Tannehills. We do this a few days before Christmas and this year we went to their house....we enjoyed a delicious meal and their home was decorated beautifully. As dear friends do, we always feel at ease with the Tannehills. We have loads of fun together--laughing, talking and catching-up.

We also have a tradition of getting together with our friends the Greens and Callicutts--and the children decorate cookies for Santa. This is really one of our favorite activities during the holiday. The iced cookies are delicious--this year Kate made over 60 cookies for the kids to decorate (we are definitely getting her some help next year) and our barn proved to be an easy place for the kids to get reeeeeealy messy while icing and decorating their Christmas-shaped cookies! I'll get the recipe from her and post....MommyDiva you really MUST work this tradition into your holiday next year...or perhaps Valentine's??

Speaking of Valentine's--my Vixen friends will recall a time when we made cookies in college for our significant others--my pre-cooking days--and my cookies were U-G-L-Y....ahhhhh. They laughed at my cookies. It's true. I remember. And I know those hussies do too! Also, I remember Maria--see her blog at left "Life in the Afternoon" was particularly proud of HER cookies....and I vivdly remember Dr. Ash GLOATING about hers! Someone has photos that document my hell-ish confections. Holla Holla Vixens!!

And...eat your heart out while viewing our cookies for Santa! Maybe I'll send cookies your way for Valentines....while I'm "writing a letter to the Editor." And maybe Gregg Graham is reading THIS post!!!!!!! LOL.....For those of you who don't know Dr. Ash...she is reeeeeally good at--well, many things but I'm thinking right now of her uncanny ability to distract baseball players during their minor league game.....Honey, it was "Sweet Briar night" at the Lynchburg Red Sox game. Of course, WE were the cutest girls there!!! Honey, the cutest in all of Virginia as far as that goes! Dr. Ash, you MUST meet my friend RT--who also had a penchant for baseball players during college....

I don't mind telling you I feel very Blessed by the friendships I have made through the years--these women keep me sane! My girlfriends, my sister, my mother, my Dad's wife and my in-laws--all women I refer to as MommyDivas--help me stay grounded and navigate the rollercoaster ride of motherhood! (And, of course, my beloved Buford T.)

I wish each of you an AUTHENTIC 2010....honey, it ain't gonna be perfect! But life as a mother is rich and full and glorious....most days. There are moments...it f-ing sucks.

So....I wish you an AUTHENTIC 2010...'happy' is blase MommyDivas.

YOU deserve more!

Happy Belated Birthday.....

I refuse to do a post before I wish my older daughter happy belated birthday!!!
This precious girl made me a Mama....and Sammy an An-tie!!

The BLessing of motherhood arrived for me 10 years ago...thanks be to God for our first-born! And thank God Buford T. is considerate and did NOT eat a double cheeseburger in front of his laboring wife who feasted on ice chips.....

Baby girl weighed in at a healthy 8lbs 3oz...and was a textbook delivery.....
She was in no rush to get here (always content with her surroundings!) and arrived precisely 1 week to the day after her due date.

We celebrated her 10th with a birthday tea party last Sunday.....
TWENTY TWEENS joined us to celebrate!!!!

I have my own favorite birthday memories, including:
all-night slumber parties in our recreation room...
seeing Raiders of the Lost Ark on the big screen....
and of course, my 8th birthday when Aunt Paula gave me the Shawn Cassidy 33 and a yellow plastic turntable....also loved the Donna Summer 33 "Last Dance"
thanks to my Mom for plannig and executing these parties and for my Dad who paid for them!!!

B-A-B-Y

Some things NEVER change! Like my baby sister acting like a BABY!
For as long as I can remember Sammy has gotten 'her way' by whining, complaining, pouting, fussing, or otherwise playing up her role as 'the baby.'

"Maaaaa-maaaa"-- she would screech.
Muffin did this. Muffin won't let me do this.....Muffin said this......
And my mother, like many mothers, always addressed the oldest child first.
"Muffin, what did you do?" "Muffin, what did you say?" "Muffin, just let her play too."
That Sammy--she always gets her way, I would fume.
They are harder on me, I used to think.

Fast forward 20--okay, 30 years. I now have 2 girls of my own. I see and understand very clearly that Mom wasn't always "taking up for Sam" like I used to think. Rather, Mom expected something different from her older child. I know this because I live this phenomenon everyday. These roles of 'the baby' and 'the boss' are even more exaggerated, I think, when 2 children are the same gender.

"Maaaaaaa-maaaaa." My younger daughter screams.
"She's being mean." "She hit me."
My typical response is directed to my older daughter, "What in the hell are you doin' to her?" "Can't I have a moment of peace in my own house?" I have even uttered the birth order mantra---"Honey, YOU are the oldest. You are supposed to be more mature. Just ignore her."
I tell my older daughter, not hiding or couching the expectation we have of her.

To which my older daughter typically responds, "You always take up for her." Hmmmmmm.
Or, my daughter responds, "You're always on her side." Hmmmmmm.
I know that feeling. I've lived that feeling.

As a parent, I don't intend to 'take up for' either child but sometimes--often--the birth order makes a difference in the expectation we have of our children. I see and understand family dynamics in a new way, as I watch them play-out in our household.

Hell, by the time my third-child gets to elementary school we'll have ZERO expectation--which, of course, is another post!

GYBGPO (get-your-big-girl-panties-on) Sammy!!! LOL.

Wednesday is church-night. No more posts at this time.......tune-in late-night!